11 September 2009

You Better Go and Get Your Armor.

Love is a Battlefield.
Life is a Battle field.

It has been a busy, busy, busy week in the Cox household. What should have been a relaxing long Labor Day weekend, turned into a busy Softball infested one. The tournament that my husband participated in consumed all of the time and energy we had. He played for a team called the Average-Joe's and although they didn't win, it was nice to be out there cheering him on! I also got a great tan!
This week, I was back at work, back getting ready for school, and really missing summer. It's funny - it is always greener somewhere else. When I was bored this summer I longed for the routine of work and school. But now that I'm back into it - I'm longing for the relaxation of the summer. Hmmphh!

Also, this week, we have some choices to make. These choices are really the adult ones that I have always wanted to make, but now that I have to - it is TOUGH! Most of our discussions lately are:

-Stay in the Military, Get out of the Military?
-If he stays in: Does he cross train, Does he stay maintenance?
-If he seperates from the Military: Do we go back to NY? Do we start looking for houses? Schools? Jobs?
-If he does cross train: Do we leave Japan in a year, Do we stay for an extra year?
-If he doesn't cross train: Do we leave Japan in a year, Do we stay an extra year?

So on top of these conversations - we have had some minor set backs, but never the less, they are setbacks.
Mine are with school - because without fail, every time I apply for financial aid they always want me to verify that we seriously make that little money. Which is taking much longer than I thought it would.
On Justin's side - he tried to rank up 6 monts early and was in a very competitive group of canidates and did not get it. It was disappointing.

So last night, after a week of these serious talks and frustrations - I went to the store and got tequila, ice cream, and chips. That way if we decided to drown our sorrows in our "drug" of choice, whatever it may be, we would be prepared. So I made a couple margaritas and Justin binged on half a bag of his favorite Snyder's (fully loaded, not lightly seasoned)  pretzels. Then I went for a long walk and he played a shoot-'em-up video game. During that time we realized just how much we love each other. It must have been between the three bug bites I got on the walk and the three person kill-streak he had in his game. I guess whatever it takes. We realized just how much we love being part of an exclusive team, where the only two members are us! We fight against the odds together, celebrate the success together, and comiserate during the bumps in our road. It feels fantastic to have someone to fight beside you against live's enemies. Those enemies sometimes come in the form of not getting a promotion, having a ton of extra paperwork to do, staying late at work, and having a wind-knocked-out-of-you kind of day.

So Love isn't the only battlefield. Life as a whole usuallly is. It is busy, messy, and frustrating. Set backs get in the way of steady progress and sometimes the hard work doesn't seem worth all the effort. But I understand now, that if you can use those set backs as motivationl energy to push a little harder, in the end the results are satisfying. And it is always more satisfying to know that you conquered a mountain and were able to take someone with you. In this case, it is my husband. As I climb up from the wreckage of one of lives many battles, I take along my husband and that is how we grow stronger and trusting.

We know that neither of us will leave the other behind to clean up the mess - each of us contributes and succeeds. When I accomplish something, I know that it wasn't just my efforts that make it possible, I am part of a team that lends support (sometimes silently and creatively) to help.

So if you are part of a team, whether your team members are brothers, sisters, friends, parents, or your children take time to appreciate them and the ways they lend their support to your dreams and accomplishments. Because you cannot step into battle alone, everyone has someone to take on the "enemies" in your life. Just figure it out and let that person know!

My Parner-In-Arms


  1. I can totally relate with this because hubby n I have been having the exact same conversations. We have a bit in common. :) I agree they're very tough decisions indeed. Ahhh what to do what to do!!!

  2. Jessie,

    These are times that I HATE being a grown-up....

    Every time we talk about this we end up at a different decision... haha!

  3. LOL I just hate being a grown up period. I wish I could go back to being a kid without a care in the world.