02 October 2009

Define Ugly, Please.

Body Image Issues.
What woman doesn't have atleast one issue with her body? And most women will sit and pick themselves apart in the mirror, myself included, daily. What makes it okay for us to be so dang mean to ourselves???

We would never, ever tell a friend to do that! If a friend is down we don't have her go home look at herself and count the pimples on her face, the cellulite on her legs, or the stretch marks on her belly! So, why in the world to we allow ourselves to do that!?

The other night, my husband asked me why I have such low confidence in myself. I didn't have an answer. I had no idea. I proceeded to list all of things that I see wrong with myself. And it was a long list... He put his hands on either side of my face, got real close and said, "I don't see any of that stuff, you are crazy if you believe anyone else does either!"
My friend, T, she said it best:
If only we could see ourselves the way our loved ones see us.
That would be something!
But after much thought and consideration, I knew and realized one source of the problem; I grew up in the media-infested age. Where not only do celebrities grace us with their beauty, the media also picks apart their "ugly" moments. But, Gosh! Is it really ugly? It is really ugly to have a little cellulite on the back of your legs? Is it really that ugly to have a pimple on your face? Is it really so freaking ugly to have gray hair!?
So - I've started something: A test, an experiment, a breakthrough (w/e it is). It is an attempt to try and gain the confidence every woman should have!
[I'm sharing advice from my very wise and wonderful friend T, who puts up with my rantings about my body just about every time we talk.]

I'm sick of my flaws being the main focus of me. Because, lets be honest, they really aren't that bad and no one notices them- unless you are saying, "can you see the pimple on the side of my right cheek (and I mean the cheek on your face!)?!?"
Here is what I did:

I've covered every mirror that shows from my neck down. [so no full length mirrors, and definitely no three-way ones!]

I'm not buying any new clothes. I will wear what is comfortable and what I feel good in.

I'm sending myself love. Post its, index cards - whatever it takes to keep reminding myself how beautiful I am.

No more diets or scheduled crazy exercising that I end up quitting because I'm so unhappy. I will eat healthy balanced meals that are satisfying and if I want dessert, I'll eat it! Everything in moderation. I will find activities that I love. No more killing myself over a 5 mile run, because well - I'm just not a runner, at all.

No more stepping on the scale everyday. It is just devastating when I see that I gained 2 pounds, when probably its just because of the water I drink... ugh!

When I feel better about who I am , I am confident. When I'm unhappy with my flaws and I'm constantly trying to change or cover them up - well it just leads to this endless cycle of not being comfortable with who I am.

This is my challenge! I'm going to stick to this. I know that who I am inside is a beautiful & confident woman. I need to let that shine through! Is there anything you could be doing in your life to let your true beauty make an appearance?

Confidence = sexy. 
[Endless diets, awful exercising, cellulite lotion, anti-wrinkle cream, 6 different kinds of acne face wash, bikini waxing, laser spider vein treatment, anti-gray hair coloring and expensive trendy clothes to cover your flawed-ridden body = unnecessary. ]

Side Note: In this months issue of Glamour Magazine, plus-size model pose in the nude showing their beautiful curves and flaws. If they can embrace themselves for the whole world to see, I can learn to love mine in the comfort of my home! :) Baby steps..



  1. Just stumbled across your blog and loved it. I really related to the self confidence post. Baby steps is a great idea. Looking at all those magazines can be depressing, but props to Glamour for their article. New follower and excited to read more!

  2. I think that's great! I stopped using my scale about 4-5 months ago. Everytime I look in those glamour magazines I would just get depressed about my bone crusher thighs. SOO I quit weighing myself and just started eating healthier.

  3. Good for you girlfrien! This post makes me so happy. We are WAY to hard on ourselves on a constant daily basis and we should all be taking these baby steps to makeover a better us! Maybe then women would stop judging eachother so harshly..

  4. Sunshine Meg: WELCOME! Thank you for joining! Even the fitness and health magazines can be somewhat depressing... But - I'm trying to get over it and just love myself! :)

    Jennifer: Good for you! I love fashion and I love doing my hair and make-up, but the clothes don't necessarily look the same on my curvy body. I just need to love the body I have and keep it healthy and happy!

    Jessica: Ugh - Women are the most harsh on each other. And that is just crazy! That could be a whole different blog topic!

  5. Rock on girlfriend!!! You look gorgeous to me so I don't know what you're worried about. ;^p You're a gorgeous lady with fabulous style and a very classy persona. That's all you need to know and that's all that should matter. People will pick you apart regardless if you're gorgeous or "ugly". It's because they have nothing else better to do with their time and usually those who are highly critical of others have even lower self esteem.

    I commend you on getting rid of the scale and the mirrors. I got rid of my scale right after high school. To me it was pointless. There are no full length mirrors in my house (although sometimes I wish there were lol). I too can be highly critical of myself. My husband thinks I'm crazy at times, but I guess it just comes with years of others criticizing me. I agree women are the worst when it comes to criticism. I've heard plenty about myself from other women for many years.

    I say forget them. They're just jealous anyway. :^p